On last night’s Real Housewives Of Atlanta episode, Porsha Williams‘ relationship with Dennis McKinley was tested. Then, she turned to the professionals for help. In happier news, the women also learned they’re going to Japan to sightsee, enjoy amazing cuisine, and take in all the local culture… HA!
We pick up at Tanya Sam‘s house. Tanya is obviously in denial. She pretends she’s hosting a real dinner party, with her real friends. However, this is a Real Housewives Of Atlanta party with fake friends who are paid to hate each other. In this case, Kandi Burruss is threatening to leave before dinner is even served (and the trip to Japan announced) because Porsha called her fake.
Obviously, the promise of food pacifies Kandi, and even though she wants to stab Porsha with a chopstick decides to stay. Still, Kandi still saltier than a pickle in a bag because Porsha won’t admit to causing a huge scene at Todd Tucker‘s birthday party. Instead, Porsha claims she was never kicked out or aggressive. She maintins that Kandi’s “team” is just trying to make her look bad.
After screaming at each other over old wounds that will never heal, Kandi and Porsha temporarily went their separate ways to calm down. Porsha tells Tanya and Marlo Hampton that she wished Kandi would’ve had the decency to hear her side of the story before convicting her. Which duh is an excellent point. How is it coming out of Porsha’s mouth?
Meanwhile, Kandi has decided Porsha is a liar and if she keeps coming after her, she will blow.
As Kandi fumes in front of everyone like a contestant on the Bachelor who isn’t getting the attention she wants, Cynthia Bailey comes over to whisper that she did nothing wrong and blames Porsha. Too bad for Cynthia that pretty much everyone overhears – even Porsha! See, this is what makes Cynthia a flip-flopper: two days ago she was at Porsha’s agreeing that Kandi’s version of events made no sense. Now, she is consoling Kandi over having to deal with Porsha and saying everyone knows Porsha probably did attack Dennis’s ex at the party and deserved to be thrown out.
Finally, Tanya hands them all kimonos and escorts them to the hibachi room, which turns into an inferno of fried eggs, bad vibes, and burned friendships. It gets so stifling Porsha escapes before food is served. Knowing she is pregnant, NeNe Leakes comes to check on her and then Tanya decides they should eat upstairs, away from the soy sauce sauna.
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Shamari DeVoe doesn’t want to wait until her food is cold to eat it. Plus, she’s craving quiet after all the screaming, so she just stays behind, scarfing down fried rice – literally licking it off her plate and sampling the salmon. Bad table manners aside it’s better than watching Porsha take out her bad mood on Eva Marcille by mentioning how she’s shading Cynthia behind her back by referring to her as the “mother” of modeling. Eva really has no excuse for herself.
Finally, Eva pops the question about Japan and frames if as if this party was all for NeNe. As an apology for leaving her off the original bachelorette party guest list. No surprise they can all go to Tokyo without even consulting their calendars, their spouses, or their day jobs. Oh wait…
The next day, however, it’s back to reality for NeNe. And that reality means babysitting Gregg while he throws grouchy tantrums over not feeling well. To celebrate his birthday they’re throwing a plant-based dinner party to introduce their family and close friends to healthier eating – especially their kids.
NeNe hired a plant-based chef who Gregg snaps at for suggesting carrots (are carrots no longer a plant?) – or other non-alkaline hybrid foods. NeNe is exasperated and the burden of being the caregiver. It is wearing on her wig and turning it frizzy. For years she was the one throwing fits and making demands while Gregg doted on her. Now that the tables are turned towards plant-based, she is not adapting well.
RELATED: Real Housewives of Atlanta Star Nene Leakes Says Gregg Is “Mean, Grouchy, & Evil For No Real Reason”; He Responds On Instagram
During the birthday party, NeNe confides to Gregg’s sister. Nene admits that she is extremely stressed about managing his emotional and physical needs, while also being the person Gregg takes out his frustrations on.
And now she can’t even emotionally eat cookies. Gregg won’t allow sugar, eggs, butter, refined flour, or any other so-called toxic foods in the house! As an additional oxidized salt in the wound, NeNe has been trying to get Gregg to eat healthier for years. But, he’s ignored her and now cancer has turned him into the kitchen nazi.
Meanwhile, Cynthia has decided it is finally time for Mike Hill to meet some of her friends. Cynthia comprised an approval and acceptance committee with Kandi, Marlo (Uh?) and Eva. Um why is she there? Since when did Eva and Cynthia become close friends? Last we saw Porsha was calling Eva out for shading Cynthia! Anyway, since Cynthia is all about games this season each of her friends gets to “speed date” with Mike. Cynthia whips out the Walmart kitchen timer she’s had since 1995. Then, each of the women get three minutes to ask probing questions.
Mike promises that unlike Cynthia’s previous man he will be honest and transparent. “I told y’all this is Hill, not Will,” he quips. Eva asks if Mike will be faithful and honest. Kandi, predictably, wonders about sex. Marlo’s focus is more practical: what’s his credit score and has he had an STD recently? At that Cynthia immediately wraps this convo up (pun intended!) and calls time. Marlo’s questions speak volumes about her priorities and her lifestyle, but at least her dress looked cute.
All the issues with Kandi have helped Porsha recognize that her real problem is actually with Dennis. Specifically that Dennis has been in contact with his ex-girlfriend, Sherri. Dennis and Porsha decided to cut off all contact with exes once they became exclusive. Except Dennis did not, in fact, do that.
This is why Sherri came up to him. Ultimately, this is what led to Porsha being in the position to potentially have an altercation at Kandi’s event. So the subtext is that Sherri confronted Dennis about why he is still talking to her if he’s with Porsha? Dennis calls this “friendly communication” and swears he is just texting back when Sherri texts him. Still, a broken promise is a broken promise, dude!
To seek solutions not worse problems, the new mature Porsha visits her therapist. She wants advice on how to fast-track the ‘getting to know you’ and ‘setting boundaries’ and ‘establishing trust’ elements of new relationship, when you’re already knocked up. It is, how you say, a unique situation.
A unique situation called Marlo needed to be asking Dennis that STD question! To her professional credit, Porsha’s therapist was extremely calm about the entire thing. She encouraged her to speak to Dennis about her past and why it contributes to her trust issues today. Porsha recognizes that in her marriage to Kordell she pretended everything was perfect to protect him, while in reality she was living a lie and making herself miserable. She doesn’t want to repeat these patterns with Dennis.
While Porsha is working on her mental side, Kandi is working on her professional one. The plan is to turn Porsha’s nasty accusation about Kandi having a sex dungeon into a money-making venture through a burlesque variety show.
RELATED: Real Housewives of Atlanta Star NeNe Leakes Livid Because Kandi Burruss Said She Met Gregg In A Strip Club
“I’m gonna take their shade, and get paid – Ok!” Kandi laughs. A variety show/burlesque? I’m pretty sure Sonja Morgan already did that and called it “Caburlesque.” Maybe Kandi and Sonja can join forces for Kanderlesque? Actually, Shamari is a natural fit to be part of the cast given that she’s thirsty to be famous again, can sing, and is trying to get out of Ronnie DeVoe’s shadow to relaunch her career.
Kandi and Shamari meet in a lingerie store, ostensibly to research ‘costumes.’
Instead, they buy racy outfits to wear for their husbands. Kandi spends $1,300 on a few scraps of lace and some leather that cover your nipples. So, um, congratulations Todd.
Over at Porsha’s, while she’s eating a hot pickle in a bag, she confronts Dennis about texting with his ex-girlfriend. Porsha explains that she just needs him to take ownership of breaking a promise and violating her trust. She needs to know that he understands why this was not OK. Instead, Dennis just moves from the bed onto the floor where he can escape quickly if things get aggressive.
To help him understand why this is so important Porsha tells Dennis that she doesn’t want to be in another fake relationship. She does not want to sacrifice being herself in order to maintain the front of a perfect relationship. Dennis only understands hot dogs, though so he smiles and offers the very best Real Housewives non-apology of ‘I’m sorry I upset you…’ Porsha isn’t satisfied but she’ll take it. After all, someone has to help pay for PJ…
TELL US – DID DENNIS VIOLATE PORSHA’S TRUST? DO YOU BELIEVE PORSHA WAS KICKED OUT OF KANDI’S EVENT?
[Photo Credits: Bravo]