Comscore

Real Housewives Of Atlanta reunion

Well, I Am living for Porsha Williams on this Real Housewives Of Atlanta reunion! And I am really LIVING for the return of the fan. I can only hope it was a gift from Kenya Moore to further piss NeNe Leakes off! Gone with the wind fabulous, but not forgotten from those sofas, sista!

Porsha is not having any of NeNe’s nonsense this reunion and for that I say: YES. Because NO to NeNe’s nonsense and awful attitude and rude unnecessary comments. Claiming you are having a breakdown is not an excuse to verbally and physically assault your friends and co-workers, NeNe! If NeNe has questions about this, she can run it by OSHA to see what they have to say about her workplace behavior.

But first – how are things between Porsha and Kandi Burruss who appeared to be getting along quite well in the latter half of this season as they came together for good against a common enemy (NeNe)? Well, Kandi and Porsha are still not so super good – meaning not following each other on Insta.

Also because they can still argue over one of the earliest fights of the season: what allegedly happened at Todd Tucker‘s birthday party. You know, the party where Kandi invited Porsha and Dennis McKinley just so Kandi’s team could (reportedly) set Porsha up to get in a drunken fight with Dennis’s ex. Even though Kandi is currently running Porch’s ovulation calendar and knows when she was knocked up to the day, she apparently didn’t count on Porsha being knocked up at Todd’s party, aka not drinking! There is some debate about whether or not Porsha was drinking though. Some of Kandi’s sources claim they saw Porsha with a glass of wine, and Kandi provides a photo of Porsha dancing while holding a glass for evidence.

Kandi Burruss

Porsha insists it’s a ‘mocktail,’ and I say Kandi’s allegation stinks of a ‘mock-tale’ – or a mock-reveal. Eva Marcille and Shamari DeVoe were both at Todd’s party and insist they never heard of Porsha causing ruckus or being thrown out, so it couldn’t have been that big of a situation. Indeed! Also, Porsha doesn’t care whose name Dennis has inked on his body beaus she is his now and she is claiming daily when she grooms him like a cat. Mmmm…  Kandi Koated!

One person who is drinking a. lot. is Shamari. And we will get to that later when Marlo Hampton and Tanya Sam join the sofas. First, we welcome Gregg Leakes, who is humble and kind and courteous, and sitting next to NeNe who is none of the above. NeNe reveals that before The Big C came along she and Gregg were already headed for The Big D. She seems to resent that Gregg getting sick meant she couldn’t leave him (and embarrass him even more on national TV by accusing him of being an awful spouse, cheating, being verbally abusive, etc). They are currently seeing a counselor. One we all know and love: Dr. Jeff. Oh, I’m sure that’s productive! Dr. Jeff has banned NeNe from calling Gregg grouchy on television, social media, or anywhere. NeNe says Gregg chose Dr. Jeff, over her objections, and I’m betting it’s because Gregg knows Dr. Jeff is well area of NeNe’s BS!

NeNe blames Gregg for being a burden on her period. Like having to travel for work so Gregg can eat his fancy alkaline vegan organic diet. That’s so productive NeNe – way to save your marriage!

NeNe Leakes & Gregg Leakes

The bottom line is this: Gregg wants to try and make the marriage work. NeNe put Gregg on the clearance rack at Swaggalicious – BLOOP – and is waiting for Eva Marcille to come buy him since she’s broke. I predict that this marriage will be done before the end of the year. Even Andy Cohen seems disgusted by how badly NeNe is dragging Gregg, dredging up decades-old cheating drama and other accusations for why she is so angry with him. Why did NeNe re-marry Gregg on the altar of Bravo if she didn’t re-love him?

We also learn that Gregg was supposed to be NeNe’s date to Eva’s wedding, but NeNe ditched him while he was still getting ready, then showed up alone complaining that Gregg wanted to separate. Hmmmm…

Finally, Tanya and Marlo join the stage and everyone starts talking about Japan and how much Marlo tried to shade Shamari and Eva. Marlo is adamant that Shamari has a drinking problem but I think it’s more like what Porsha said, “Shamari has a problem with drinking.” It seems like when Shamari goes out she drinks because she’s nervous and also probably bored from having to sit through NeNe’s 300th breakdown over how no one understands how hard it is to be NeNe. Wouldn’t you drink?

Also as Shamari said, who is Marlo to discuss anyone’s errant behavior!? If Shamari wanted advice about gold digging or shopping, yes, Marlo would be your girl, but Shamari is married to THE Living LEGEND, Ronnie DeVoe (LOL) so she doesn’t even need help in that department! The shopping, yes – and Shamari admits that seeing herself on Real Housewives Of Atlanta made her realized how low-budget her clothing was. That red strapless type-top thing she wore to Cynthia‘s Bailey-Que … <<shudder>> However Shamari looked sensational at the reunion. And also at Eva’s wedding! So clearly girl is learning from some of her mistakes – hopefully, next season (if Shamari is back) she’ll learn how to handle her liquor!

Shamari DeVoe

As for Shamari’s wasted moments at the Bye Wig party, Shamari isn’t embarrassed and  Tanya, who cleaned up her puke isn’t pressed, but Eva wants her ruined shoes back. Shading, probably unnecessarily, Eva’s finances Shamari snarks that she was going to pay to have them cleaned until she found out the shoe was worth like $1. Instead, she got Eva a $1 gift card. Eva is practically in tears as she whines that she got those shoes in Morocco, so of course, they were like $1. These girls always have their priorities mixed up — like the fact that Eva got the shoes traveling and they had sentimental value is so worthless, but not having a Gucci label = Marlo wouldn’t let you near her poon (and that means it’s worth something. Or something.)

NeNe Leakes & Marlo Hampton

However, one astute viewer points out that NeNe (and Marlo) have no business going after anyone else’s fashions when 90% of the time NeNe wears an [ill-fitting] white t-shirt, jeans, and a duster. So where’s the fashion!? Marlo, loyal to a fault, lays down on NeNe’s stiletto when she declares that NeNe can walk into her closet to pull out all the designer she wants. Therefore NeNe’s high-low look is acceptable, but as Tanya mumbles, “How would we know – we aren’t allowed into her closet.” I think that’s what NeNe was hiding – a ton of Walmart bags!

Then NeNe starts going off about Tanya who owes NeNe for being on this show and is repaying her by trying to argue with NeNe to stay on this show. Correction, NeNe, I do not think you will be staying on this show! Even Andy made that clear. NeNe needs to go.

NeNe wants all these girls to argue with her, because it reaffirms her relevance as The Star, yet she complains incessantly that they are all using her for relevance. Well except Marlo. She is the very definition of a soldier. NeNe compares Tanya to one of the coy fish because Tanya started turning on NeNe to get in with the school, but that’s pretty much the opposite of what happened.

Basically: Whatever NeNe.

Tanya Sam & Eva Marcille

Then we must begin to discuss the Bye Wig Party. First of all, after being so late in Japan that the tour guide left her (plus being late to the reunion), NeNe still has the audacity to lecture Porsha on being 4 hours late. Sure that was rude, of course. Marlo eventually got a pass for being the only person willing to still stand beside NeNe (other than Gregg who wants to EAT), but even Marlo timidly asks for an apology from NeNe for the way she was treated at the Bye Wig affair.

Cynthia forgets herself for a moment and explains that NeNe, for all her boisterousness, is a private person who doesn’t like uninvited guests or drop-bys, and Marlo knows that, which explains why NeNe was so angry. STILL – Marlo thought NeNe was in crisis! Which is what she heard from Gregg. That’s why Marlo drove over to NeNe’s uninvited. It’s not like Marlo was just feeling bored and wanted to come paw through NeNe’s fridge. But who cares about Marlo, who definitely seems to have lost her edges this season: she’s all over NeNe like double-sided tape, she got read for the filth by Eva, and even Shamari clowned her hard at the reunion.

Marlo tries, then gives up, with Tanya because Tanya is too intelligent for Marlo and NeNe who just yell over her because they have no valid points. When put up against anyone witty or smart, you realize that NeNe isn’t even good at throwing shade, which is ostensibly why she’s so amazing on this show! Or not!

Despite, for a second, identifying herself as NeNe’s friend, Cynthia has a later moment of reckoning and points out – with NeNe interrupting like a child – that NeNe is her own worst enemy by not letting people in. NeNe continuously accuses these women of not supporting her, but when exactly did that happen!? When Cynthia dared to invite Kenya to a PRODUCT LAUNCH PARTY that had 500 other guests? That is what NeNe is considering this great stab in the back? Marlo keeps insisting there is more to the story that we didn’t see? So, OK, what is it?! NeNe needs to stop sitting up there, with her stank-ass face, like she’s wearing a poopy diaper and waiting for it to be changed. What happened that is so egregious she is now calling CYNTHIA, of all people, a traitor and disowning her as a friend?

Porsha Williams - Real Housewives Of Atlanta

Finally, Porsha loses it! Pregnant Porsha does not care. She is over the shenanigans and bullshit from Ms. Leakes, and flapping that fan, lets NeNe have it about who the actual bad friend is! Porsha reminds NeNe that every single woman on this stage tried, and tried and tried, to be there for her so to be told otherwise, makes Porsha question whether NeNe has ever been sincere in their friendship. The answer, lil sis, is NO. These girls were always convenience for NeNe in her rise to wannabe famedom. And when NeNe couldn’t achieve that she came crawling back to Real Housewives of Atlanta, dragging her ‘Fouxboutin’ flats, and blaming the other girls for still being there.

Porsha says she couldn’t leave the reunion without pointing out the obvious nonsense of NeNe’s position, and what a slap in the face it was to all of them. Even Andy was visibly annoyed several times and argued with NeNe to either share what really happened or get over herself. And speaking of slaps – next week we finally get to hear what happened with Porsha’s belt at the No Wig party!

TELL US – DOES SHAMARI HAVE A DRINKING PROBLEM? WHAT DO YOU THINK OF PORSHA’S LECTURE TO NENE?

[Photo Credits: Bravo]

Click here to read our Comment Policy